Hmmm... today I am contemplating the topic of coming "out of the broom closet". My online persona "Lillie" is obviously out. loud and proud. My personal life is another thing. I've "come out" to my husband and my sister, but neither were entirely surprised. They both know me quite well and both have said it made sense to them to take the step to move towards "official study".
My sister and I spent hours talking about how our upbringing geared us to being Pagan and/or Wiccan. My husband has been so supportive that he has helped me make things that I wanted to make. He is even building me a cabinet to store my herbs & supplies. He's been very supportive to say the least.
This made me feel empowered and good. Both are quite supportive. It seems my personality and beliefs are a good fit for being Wiccan for those who know me. I've obviously had my beliefs for a lifetime. Close friends weren't surprised and friends who I learned had similar beliefs were welcoming as we all need people who are "out" to have a supportive circle of friends.
It's those in the business world that I wonder about. Should I TELL them I am Wiccan or Pagan? I'm thinking, 'nah, what's the point' is the answer I most lean to. I live my life the way I do, why do they NEED to know that I am Wiccan. I'm sure they Know I am Pagan at the very least. Who can hide that?
The pros of them Knowing would be that I represent that Wiccan's are good people too. I'd think this would be the main benefit. Many people ostracize Wiccans and Pagans as they see them as 'evil' or 'not of god'. Although I live my life to exude good intentions, what benefit would it have for me to 'come out'?
From this perspective it would bring many more cons to the forefront. I work with kids and most of the parents, from what I can tell, have a Christian background. My fear is that I would be seen and judged in a negative light if people were certain of my spiritual beliefs. It is one thing to think someone is something and another all together to know.
I have only shared with two people that I am certainly Wiccan. One because she told me her beliefs first and that I reciprocated information. The second, because I was asked point blank and I just don't like to lie. I must also admit that it still made me nervous to share the information, although both are good people and I don't think it will be an issue in the long run. But there is the other side of me that wonders... What if the first woman decides she no longer is interested in being a Wiccan? What if she decides to hold that information against me? This makes me nervous and I sometimes think about that. It's too late to take that information back, but sometimes I wish I hadn't shared.
I have to have faith that Goddess put me in these situations to force me to overtly take a stand. I have to trust that by taking that stand I will not be penalized. I am pretty certain that the second woman would not do anything to hurt someone. I have known her for 11 years and she is very kind-hearted and fairly non-judgmental although she is a Christian. She asked me point-blank after having known her for 6 years. She was doing research for a book she was writing and asked me as it occurred to her that I was Wiccan. Once I admitted my background, she used me for research on her book. When I typed that, it caused me to laugh. You know, she still hasn't published that book...
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